Thursday, May 19, 2011

Children's Week

Children's Week, or the Week of the Wardens, seems to be loosely based off of Japan's Children's Day. You pick-up orphans from Stormwind/Orgrimmar, Shattrath City, and Dalaran and take them to places of their choosing to meet famous Lore heroes and buy them toys. At the completion of each separate string of quests, you'll receive your choice of multiple pets.

First we're going to go over the Stormwind and Orgrimmar quest chains. With the inclusion of Cataclysm, this quest-lines have changed from the past few years.
  1. Cruisin' The Chasm: Your little human orphan wants you to take him down to Westfall, hop into one of the lovely rental choppers, and take a cruise over to the gigantic chasm with a huge tornado inside of it. Why we, as wardens, thought this would be a good idea, is beyond me. The kid has a good time, no one is dead, he's happy.
  2. Malfurion Has Returned!: Take your orphan over to Darnassus and introduce him to the legendary druid himself, Malfurion Stormrage. Ol' Malfy will even throw an enchantment on the fella to give him wings for a bit.
  3. The Biggest Diamond Ever!: If you've read the Warcraft novel 'The Shattering,' then you know what happens to poor Magni Bronzebeard. Your orphan wants to see him. Head on over to Ironforge and go to the throne room. That door that's always been closed is now open and you can head down into Old Ironforge to see Magni.
  4. You Scream, I Scream...: Head over to the Mage Quarter of Stormwind. Near the Blue Recluse inn, there is a small ice cream stand. Purchase a 'Cone of Cold' ice cream cone and hand it over to your little orphan.
  5. Let's Go Fly A Kite: There is a gnome pushing a small cart around the outside of the Trade District. Stop him and purchase a 2-Part Kite set. Fly the kites with your orphan for a bit.
  6. A Warden Of The Alliance: Purchase a Foam Sword Rack from the traveling gnome toy salesmen and return to the orphan matron. Turn in the rack, the orphans will snatch them up and start playing. The matron offers you your reward..
  1. Ridin' The Rocketway: Your new orc orphan wants to go to the new Goblin Rocketway, so that's where you're headed. Head on over to Azshara and ascend the Southern Rocketway Terminus. Board the Redhound Two-Seater Prototype and take a trip down the rocketway in style.
  2. The Banshee Queen: Time to head to the Tirisfal Glades and ascend into the Undercity to meet the matriarch of the Forsaken, Sylvanas Windrunner. Apparently the blood elf ambassador gets a little pissy that your orphan is speaking the Queen of the Dead herself.
  3. The Fallen Chieftain: Just like the Alliance version to go see Magni, in 'The Shattering,' Cairne Bloodhoof challenges Garrosh Hellscream to a duel to the death. Magatha of the Grimtotem tribe poisons Garrosh's Gorehowl and a small cut cripples Cairne and Garrosh finishes him off.
  4. You Scream, I Scream...: Head back to Orgrimmar and head down to the Goblin Slums section of town. Find the Cone of Cold shop and purchase a 'Cone of Cold' ice cream cone for your orphan. Let him get a brain freeze and then move on to the next quest.
  5. Let's Go Fly A Kite: Much like the Alliance version, you have to find someone pushing a toy cart. This time, you're looking for a goblin on the outside of the Drag. Purchase the 2-Part Kite set and set them aloft with your orphan. After playing with them for some time, it's time to send them back to the orphanage.
  6. A Warden Of The Horde: Pick up a Foam Sword Rack from the goblin toy vendor and head back to the orphan matron. Let the kids play around with their foam swords and then pick up your new companion, or your 5 gold.
And with that, it's time to move on to the Shattrath City orphan quests. Again, split into both Alliance and Horde questlines.
  1. Auchindoun And The Ring Of Observance: Your little Draenei orphan wants to go to the Auchindoun, which is now the ruins of an old mausoleum for the Draenei people. Go see the Summoning Stone near the center and appease your orphan by trying to help them summon someone. 
  2. Jheel Is At Aeris Landing!: Apparently our little orphan has a sibling who is working with the Ethereals over at the Aeris Landing in Nagrand. So that's where we're going. When arriving, they chat for a bit and your quest completion is after you talk to Jheel.
  3. A Trip To The Dark Portal: Since your orphan is a Draenei, they've never seen the Dark Portal before. Time to head over that way and check it out. You have to land on the very top platform at the Dark Portal for your orphan to run up amazed at the sight.
  4. The Seat Of The Naaru: Despite being a Draenei, they've never seen the Exodar. Time to take your little orphan down to the new Draenei capital city on Azeroth and have a talk with O'ros down at the bottom of the middle section of the Exodar. He'll tell you to go talk to Farseer Nobundo.
  5. Time To Visit The Caverns: Quickest way to get here is to get a portal to Dalaran opened up by a friendly mage and take the free portal in the Violet Citadel. If you take the free dragon ride, you'll land opposite of the center of where you need to go. Go meet up with the big bronze dragon. After the little run-in, head back up the tunnel a bit and talk to the Keepers of Time quartermaster to get your toy dragon for your orphan. With toy in hand, it's time to return to the matron.
  6. Back To The Orphanage: Head back to Shattrath the quickest way you know how. Either a mage friend or flying your ass through the Dark Portal. Upon getting back to the matron, you'll get your choice of four pets.
  1. Hch'uu Of The Mushroom People: After picking up your new little Blood Elf companion, it's time to head over to Zangarmarsh and meet up with your orphan's long, lost friend of the Sporeggar people; Hch'uu. Who apparently ran away from a fungal giant and got lost, which is why she was in the Shattrath orphanage.
  2. Visit The Throne Of The Elements: After the reminiscing is over with, it's time to make your way over to Nagrand and drop in on the Elementals of the Throne. Let the orphan have a wide-eyed gander at all of the large-sized Elementals before talking to one of the Earthen Ring.
  3. A Trip To The Dark Portal: Finishing up on the Throne of the Elements makes your orphan want to take a peak at another oversized site; the Dark Portal that leads to Azeroth. Land up on the platform and let your orphan get an eyeful of the object that spans two planets and connects them together.
  4. Now, When I Grow Up...: Unlike the Draenei orphan that is destined to become a powerful shaman of her people, your Blood Elf has a less significant goal in life.. to become part of the Elite Tauren Chieftains rock band. Head over to the Blood Elf capital of Silvermoon City to wave at the band members.
  5. Time To Visit The Caverns: Find a quick way to get to Dalaran, so you can steal the free portal down to the Caverns of Time. Either fly your way down when you get there and pick up the toy dragon from the quartermaster on the way down, or take the free flight from the dragon at the top. Either way, go see the big bronze dragon and get your toy dragon. With all that finished, it's time to head back to Shattrath City.
  6. Back To The Orphanage: Head back to Shattrath the quickest way you know how. Either a mage friend or flying your ass through the Dark Portal. Upon getting back to the matron, you'll get your choice of four pets.
Not that it matters the order in which you complete the questlines involved with either faction's orphan quests.. You can now head to Dalaran and pick up one of two quests for one more Children's Week pet. Depending on which questline you complete, depends on the pet that you receive.
  1. Little Orphan Roo Of The Oracles: Talk to the matron standing near the floating statue by the southern bank and select this option to start the quest to get the Gorloc pet.
  2. The Biggest Tree Ever!: Grab the little Oracles orphan and make your way over to the Grizzly Hills. You're going to be going to Grizzlemaw, the home of the furbolgs. You have to go down to the very bottom of the tree, where there is small tree growing.
  3. The Bronze Dragonshrine: After escaping the furbolgs, it's time to head over to the Bronze Dragonshrine in Dragonblight. Much like when, or if, you did the quests for Chromie at the Wyrmrest Temple, your little orphan here is going to see the future version of himself.
  4. Playmates!: Once he's done talking to himself, head on over to the Borean Tundra and swing down to the Winterfin Retreat. Your orphan will meet up with a baby murloc and start dancing. Though how Bladestorming can be considered dancing, I'm not entirely sure..
  5. Meeting A Great One: Once your orphan is done making friends, it's time to go experience some Oracles culture. Go up into the Sholazar Basin and head through the Waygate by the Mosslight Pillar. Passing through this Waygate teleports you to the Un'goro Crater. Make your way up the little pathway and stop at the angry-looking construct.
  6. The Dragon Queen: Head back through the Waygate to get back to the Basin and make your way back down to Dragonblight. It's time to stop in at the Wyrmrest Temple. Your little orphan wants to meet the Life-Binder herself.
  7. A Trip To The Wonderworks: Time to head back to Dalaran, but before you go talk to the matron, your little buddy here wants to get some playtime in with you. Head over to the Wonderworks toy shop and buy the Small Paper Zeppelin. It's only available for purchase when you're actually on this quest. After you toss it back and forth, it's time to take him back to the matron.
  8. Back To The Orphanage: Head back over to the floating statue and return the Oracle back to the matron. You won't receive the pet initially, but it comes in the mail. Logging out and back in should do it, or taking a portal somewhere else. Any loading screen makes it appear, I believe.
  1. Little Orphan Kekek Of The Wolvar: Talk to the matron standing near the floating statue by the southern bank and select this option to start the quest to get the Wolvar pet.
  2. Home Of The Bear-Men: Once you're got your feisty little devil with you, it's time to head over to the Grizzly Hills. You're going to be going to the home of the furbolgs, Grizzlemaw. You're going to have to go to the very bottom of the broken tree to where a small tree is growing.
  3. The Bronze Dragonshrine: Once that's over, it's time to head over to Dragonblight. You're going to be making a stop at the Bronze Dragonshrine for your little orphan to meet his future-self and have a little heart-to-heart.
  4. Playmates!: Since you're in Dragonblight still, you might as well wonder over to the Snowfall Glade and let your orphan pup play around with some other Wolvar pups. They throw snowballs at each other for a while.
  5. The Dragon Queen: Then it's time to head over to the Wyrmrest Temple, where your orphan wants to meet the mighty Alexstrasza. Krasus even talks to him for a bit.
  6. The Mighty Hemet Nesingwary: Once you're done meeting the Queen of the Red Dragonflight, it's time to head over to the Sholazar Basin and meet your orphans hunter idol. Head over to the Nesingwary Base Camp on the western side of the Basin, so your orphan can have a chat with Hemet Nesingwary.
  7. A Visit To The Wonderworks: Once he's gotten all of his meet-and-greets out of the way, it's time to head back to Dalaran. Before heading back to the matron, you need to make a quick stop in at the Wonderworks toy shop. Your Wolvar orphan wants to have a little playtime with you, by tossing back and forth some paper zeppelins. Make sure to pick-up the Small Paper Zeppelin that's only for purchase when you have this quest.
  8. Back To The Orphanage: After you're done playing, it's time to go back to the matron. Head over to the floating statue by the southern bank and return your Wolvar orphan. You won't receive your pet initially, but it comes in the mail. Logging out and back in should do it, or taking a portal to somewhere else. Any loading screen makes it appear, I believe.
And now that we've gone over ALL of the questlines, for both Alliance and Horde, it's time to look at getting those achievements. Hopefully you still have some time left after traversing multiple continents and separate worlds to get some of these in.
  • Home Alone: Is your orphan currently staring at your with wondrous eyes of wonder? Use your hearthstone. Congratulations, you just left your orphan wherever you just were. But you got an achievement! Now, blow your whistle again and get back to making them happy. Asshole.
  • Bad Example: Begin nomming on delicious sweets right in front of your poor little orphan. Head to Dalaran and pick up a Red Velvet Cupcake, a Lovely Cake Slice, a Dalaran Doughnut, and a Dalaran Brownie. After that, head down to Stormwind and pick up a cone of Tigole and Foror's Strawberry Ice Cream. Then, either make or procure a Delicious Chocolate Cake and a Tasty Cupcake. Devour all of this in front of your hungry orphan's face and you.. are a horrible person.
  • Daily Chores: Have your orphan with you as you complete five daily quests. Any five, doesn't matter what. It's more exciting if you make it something dangerous. Like.. Fishing. Or cooking.
  • Aw, Isn't It Cute?: Complete any string of orphan quests from the Stormwind/Orgrimmar, Shattrath, or Dalaran orphans and receive a pet. You get this achievement just for getting a pet. It's win/win!
  • School Of Hard Knocks: One of those "awesome" PvP achievements that Blizzard likes to integrate into certain holidays to make you experience both the PvE and PvP aspects of the game. Have your orphan out as you return a fallen flag in Warsong Gulch, assault a base in Arathi Basin, assault a tower in the Alterac Valley, and capture a flag in Eye of the Storm. This achievement will probably take the longest for most people depending on level and the player.
  • Hail To The King, Baby: Be of level and head into Utgarde Pinnacle in Howling Fjord of Northrend. Make your way to the end of the instance and knock King Ymiron's face in. Make sure your orphan is watching! As he goes down, your orphan will cheer at death. Since this achievement has a level requirement, it might be the last of the meta you're working toward for this holiday.
  • Veteran Nanny: A three-year long achievement. You have to get three of the, now, four Shattrath pets; Peanut, Willy, and Egbert. Legs is a new addition to the roster, so he doesn't count toward this achievement. He might in the future, but as of right now, it's still only the original Burning Crusade three.
And now time for my own accomplishments..

Warrior: Matron of '09. Received Veteran Nanny in '11.

Paladin: Matron of '10. Received her first pet back in '08. Finished off Veteran Nanny in '11.

Druid: Matron of '10. Two more years to go until Veteran Nanny.

Death Knight: Patron of '10. Two more years to go until Veteran Nanny.

Mage: Not a Patron. Being a weak-bodied mage, taking down King Ymiron without a group will be tough. The King dies next year. Veteran Nanny in three years, because I apparently didn't do the Shattrath questline at all this year.

Rogue: Not a Patron. Rogue wasn't a bad enough example, didn't go to school, and wasn't a high enough level for the King. At least he'll be a Veteran Nanny in two years.
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Tuesday, May 17, 2011

Noblegarden

Blizzard's version of Easter for the World of Warcraft. This is a week long event that, like most of the religious related events, has absolutely nothing to do with anything religion based. Your main goal behind the Noblegarden holiday?

Go egg-hunting. A lot.

The only quests involved with this holiday are ones that ask you to gather eggs. One of them is even a daily! So, seriously.. Get to gathering eggs. All of the achievements obtainable for this holiday require you to get something out of the eggs. Whether it be actual pieces of holiday clothing, or the chocolate that is then used to purchase items from the holiday vendor to participate in certain events.

Egg-Hunting. Serious business. Okay, screw this, time for the achievements.
  • I Found One!: Remember how I told you to go egg-hunting already? You get this for finding an egg. Aren't you amazing?!
  • Chocolate Lover/Chocoholic: For each egg that you gather up, you get a piece of Noblegarden Chocolate. You can either save these up and use them as currency, or devour 100 of them to get the two achievements. The first one is for eating 25. Keep eating all the way up to 100 and you get Chocoholic.
  • Sunday's Finest: While you're out snatching up those brightly colored eggs for people to slow to get them before you can.. You're going to be on the look out for special clothing. To get this particular achievement, you're looking for a White Tuxedo Shirt and a pair of Black Tuxedo Pants. You have to acquire both through the eggs, no purchasing or trading counts. Neither of these items are soulbound, so you can pass them over to your bank toon or to someone that just wants to look dandy.
  • Dressed For The Occasion: Keep cracking open those eggs until you found yourself with an Elegant Dress. How they stuffed this, or even the pants or shirt, inside of an egg is beyond me. Like the pants and shirt, you can't cheat your way out of this and get them traded over or purchase them through the vendor.
  • Hard Boiled: As your picking up eggs, you have a random chance to be turned into a bunny. This achievement will require this form, but the easiest way to complete the achievement is to get a friend who has a Bountiful Branch on them. Head on down to the Un'goro Crater and meander over to the Golakka Hot Springs. Become a bunny, lay an egg under the hot water, and you're done.
  • Spring Fling: By either purchasing the Spring Rabbit pet from the vendor or getting it from one of those brightly colored eggs, you're going to have to do some traveling. You have to go to each of the four starter locations where eggs are located and have your Spring Rabbit and someone else's Spring Rabbit.. Make babies. When they say "like rabbits," they weren't kidding.
  • Noble Garden: Use some of that leftover chocolate that I know you're tired of throwing out or eating and purchase your very own Brightly Colored Egg. Head into Stormwind or Orgrimmar and drop it down. Pick it right back up. Achievement get! Plus, you have a "free" chance at getting another item. You'll probably just get more chocolate, though.
  • Shake Your Bunny Maker: Take your Spring Flowers item and equip it. You'll either get these from an egg or from the holiday vendor. Run around like a chicken with its head cut off until you find someone who is over level 18.. And is of the female variety. Use the flowers! Pow! Free bunny ears. Over level 18 and bunny ears.. Hrmmm...
  • Desert Rose: Don your "beautiful" Spring Robes, either from an egg or from the vendor, and begin your long trek. You have to head down to The Badlands, Silithus, Desolace, Thousand Needles, and Tanaris. By 'using' your robes, you'll plant a rose. Do this in every desert and this achievement proves you have a green thumb.
  • Blushing Bride: Find a friend wearing the Elegant Dress, whether it be male or female. Throw on your White Tuxedo Shirt and Black Tuxedo Pants and throw them a kiss or two.
And because it totally matters, here comes the item collection list for this holiday. I'm not going to bother mentioning that you can obtain these items out of the eggs. I'm only going to list their vendor prices.
  • Tome of Polymorph: Rabbit: For mages only. This can only be purchased from the holiday vendor for a grand total of 100 Noblegarden Chocolate. You have to be level 60 to learn it AND to purchase it.
  • Spring Rabbit's Foot: It's a bunny! You can purchase it with 100 Noblegarden Chocolate. You'll need to get this pet eventually if you plan on completing the holiday meta.
  • Spring Circlet: Net yourself your own pair of sexy bunny ears with this 50 Noblegarden Chocolate purchase.
  • Elegant Dress: If you plan on being the bride who blushes, drop 50 Noblegarden Chocolate off at your local holiday vendor and prepare to be blown away with kisses.
  • White Tuxedo Shirt: Are you too sexy for your shirt? Well, pick up this dandy formal wear for 25 Noblegarden Chocolate.
  • Black Tuxedo Pants: Combine with the White Tuxedo Shirt for best effect. For 25 Noblegarden Chocolate.
  • Spring Robes: If you plan on going on a flower planting spree, you're going to need these robes. They put Harvest Moon to shame. To get your green thumb on, you only need 50 Noblegarden Chocolate.
  • Spring Flowers: Want to become Hugh Hefner? Need some 'Bunnies? Grab a bouquet of Spring Flowers and get to hip-hopping. 50 Noblegarden Chocolate at your local 'Bunny Manor.
  • Egg Basket: Completing the quest to gather 10 pieces of Noblegarden Chocolate nets you this item. It's an off-hand frill equip that gives you a 60% run speed increase for 10 seconds, on a 10 second cooldown. So you can spam it to gather eggs.
The fact that it took me this long to post a blog about this holiday is ridiculous and I feel like a huge failure for it.

Also, I don't think my lame jokes for the items could have gotten any worse.

Warrior: The Noble of '09. Had all achievements completed in two days.

Paladin: The Noble of '09. Had all achievements completed two days after my Warrior's meta was completed.

Druid: The Noble of '09. Had all achievements completed the day after my Paladin's meta was completed.

Death Knight: The Noble of '10. Had all achievements completed in two days. There's a pattern here..

Mage: The Noble of '09. Had all achievements completed between my Warrior's meta completion and when I started my Paladin's meta.

Rogue: Not a Noble. There needs to be some bunny love, bunny makin' shakin', a lovely dress, some bride kissing, some desert roses, and a hard boiled egg.
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