Hardmode Reroll: The Story of Kutira (Day 4)

Name: Kutira
Race: Orc
Class: Warrior
Spec: Fury/Protection
Guild: <Reckless Minority>
Server: Alterac Mountains-US

Completed Questing Areas:
Durotar
Mulgore
Northern Barrens
Eversong Woods
Tirisfal Glades
Azshara (All three completed 'Glutton' achievements, plus 'Joy Ride')
Ghostlands
Silverpine Forest
Hillsbrad Foothills
Ashenvale
Stonetalon Mountains

Completed Dungeons [Weapon Hoarding]:
Ragefire Chasm [Oggleflint's Inspirer, Cursed Felblade, Bazzalan's Blade]
Deadmines [Smite's Reaver, Cookie's Tenderizer]
Wailing Caverns [Stinging Viper, Worn Turtle Shell Shield]
Shadowfang Keep [Baron's Scepter, Commander's Crest, Haunting Blade]
Stormwind Stockades [Cold Iron Pick]
Blackfathom Deeps [-]
Gnomeregan [Hydrocane]
Razorfen Kraul [Thornspike]
Maraudon [-]
Scarlet Monastery: Graveyard [-]
Scarlet Monastery: Library [-]
Scarlet Monastery: Armory [Ravager]
Scarlet Monastery: Cathedral [Aegis of the Scarlet Commander]

The day started off with me stealthily sneaking my way into Darnassus to get the Elder there, and then moving on to Dolanaar deep inside Teldrassil. Successfully acquiring that Elder as well, I explored Teldrassil's treetop landscape, before moving on to more important things..

I have crushed the three mighty beasts of Ashenvale; Sharptalon, Shadumbra, and Ursangous. Created and used the Goblin bombs on flyovers on Astranaar. Vanquished the enraged fire elementals at the behest of his other elemental brethren. Decimated the mighty furbolg villages and saved a captured Tauren. Cleared the Zoram Strand of naga, hydra, and the vicious Vorsha the Lasher. Delved into the caves of the Blackfathom Deeps for crystals and to spill naga-witch blood. Ashenvale.. Belongs to the Horde.

I mapped out the region of Ashenvale and then accessed the nooks and crannies of the region of Darkshore before heading down into the Stonetalon Mountains to work under Overlord Krom'gar. I quickly established myself among his recruits, slaying the Alliance and retrieving the battle plans for an attack on Krom'gar Fortress. I helped Clarissa rebuild her Large Daddy.. And then used his power to decimate the gnomish engineers and their robots down in the Windshear Valley. I assisted the idiot scouts down in the Deep Reaches at gathering materials, killing elementals, and saving peons. I refueled our bomb at the Sludgewerks and killed wyverns for a goblin; which probably wasn't a good idea in hindsight.

I met with General Grebo and High Chieftain Cliffwalker at Cliffwalker Post. I used a demolisher to.. ... Demolish the Alliance army and their glaive throwers. I learnt of deception and betrayal, and assisted in committing treason against the "new Horde." After becoming Krom'gar's new General after Grebo's death at my own hands, I watched the destruction of the druid's Thal'darah Grove at the insane hands of Overlord Krom'gar... Who then was 'dismissed' from duty by the Warchief himself. He also met face-to-ground shortly after his dismissal a little further down the cliff wall. Garrosh stripped my rank of General out from under me, but let me keep my head at the behest of High Chieftain Cliffwalker.

With nothing left for me in Stonetalon Mountain after the destruction of the Grove and the death of my commanding officer, I decided to move on over to the Arathi Highlands where the Banshee Queen had requested I go. Just because I'm an orc doesn't mean I work for Garrosh, y'know? I met with Dark Ranger Alina and the recently resurrected Galen Trollbane on a mission to destroy the Boulderfist ogres, rip the amulets from the gushing throats of the Syndicate, and reclaim the sword Trol'kalar. Proving successful in all these endeavors, especially the killing of humans, I was sent to Hammerfall, where I fell into a trap.

Called to a stone near the Eastern Binding, I was convinced that I would be helping a Goddess escape her prison. After retrieving the keys from the other three Circles and crushing the elementals present, I crushed a rock giant to retrieve the final piece of the puzzle. Using the three keys to unlock the obelisk, I inserted the Rod of Order to unlock Myzrael from her imprisonment. Convinced that this was no longer a wonderful idea, I conversed with Zaruk who told me to summon her early, crush her hopes and dreams, and re-shackle her back to her stone. She was a handful, she was, and quite angry at my turn-coating, but I did what needed to be done and removed that particular problem from the face of Azeroth.

After all that excitement, I was left with one task.. Kill the Witherbark Trolls and make sure they knew that the Horde wasn't going to put up with their crap. An orc killing trolls.. I feel like Garrosh and Vol'jin. *cough* Goutgut, one of Dark Ranger Alina's companions, wanted me to go to Faldir's Cove and see his friend Lolo.. So.. Uh.. I'm gonna go there now. Okay, bye.

Signing off for journal entry two, Kutira.

Hardmode Reroll: The Story of Kutira (Day 1*)

Name: Kutira
Race: Orc
Class: Warrior
Spec: Fury/Protection
Guild: <Reckless Minority>
Server: Alterac Mountains-US

I wish I had thought of this back at the beginning, so I could have kept track of story of Kutira from start-to-finish, but I'm still relatively low level, so starting this "late" shouldn't be a huge issue.

Completed Questing Areas:
Durotar
Mulgore
Northern Barrens
Eversong Woods
Tirisfal Glades
Azshara (All three completed 'Glutton' achievements, plus 'Joy Ride')
Ghostlands
Silverpine Forest
Hillsbrad Foothills

Completed Dungeons [Weapon Hoarding]:
Ragefire Chasm [Oggleflint's Inspirer, Cursed Felblade, Bazzalan's Blade]
Deadmines [Smite's Reaver, Cookie's Tenderizer]
Wailing Caverns [Stinging Viper, Worn Turtle Shell Shield]
Shadowfang Keep [Baron's Scepter, Commander's Crest, Haunting Blade]
Stormwind Stockades [Cold Iron Pick]
Blackfathom Deeps [-]
Gnomeregan [Hydrocane]
Razorfen Kraul [Thornspike]

My current questing area is Ashenvale. I have rode Brutusk the Kodo until his death, diverted the siege on Splintertree Post, performed genocide on the demons of Demon Fall Canyon; the dreadlords included, and learned just how sneaky I am not while doing anti-night elf espionage and assassinations. My current objectives are to relieve a orc warlock of his head, break the horns off of some dead satyr, and to head all the way across Ashenvale to meet up with the commander of another Horde outpost. But..

I put all of that on hold. Because the Lunar Festival started, and I'm a Holiday Whore, as my previous posts about HOLIDAYS could have probably told you. So I began my holiday routine on my main server and knocked out (4) of my (6) 85s and then came back.. And decided that Kutira needed the same level of dedication to achievements. I mean, damn.. There's free master flying involved in this. Plus, free exp and money. It's win/win/win for me.

Nabbed the Elder in Orgrimmar, then the one in Thunder Bluff, then scooted over to the Eastern Kingdoms and started lodging my complaints against the placement of Elders. Spent ~100 deaths attempting and succeeding to get the Ironforge and Stormwind Elders. Determination is key, and macros. Definitely macros. Pushed on and eventually had the insane idea to go after Uldum's Elders, after finishing Tanaris. I succeeded at getting the Uldum ones, too. As well as exploring the entire zone on a 60% riding ground mount. Without assistance from any level 80+s. Got the help of a warlock buddy [Awakened] and some priestly ladies [Effy and Illuminate] to Warlock summon me into Deepholm to get the Elder at the Temple of Earth, and then the one over at Stonehearth. Rather than have them summon me back to the Temple to leave, I ran. Levitated, mostly. They Life-Gripped me around the mobs and through them, as they escorted me all the way back to the Temple. I "awarded" them 1000 'Kutira Rep' a piece, and then went back to doing Eastern Kingdoms following that success.

Once I had finished off all of Eastern Kingdoms, I took a small break to do a little PvP. I was level 38 by this point; gaining (4) levels from exploring and Elder quests. I garnered up enough Honor to purchase most of the PvP awards from the quartermasters of the Warsong Outriders and the Defilers. After scraping myself off of the floor of many Alliance wins, I finally took the trek into Twilight Highlands to knock those Elders. Despite Twilight Highlands being a higher level than both Deepholm and Uldum, I had an easier time exploring and getting the Elders there than both of those combined. Wish I could fly, as the only way to complete the exploration of Twilight Highlands is to be able to fly up to the Vermillion Redoubt. Or be ported by a Warlock. ;D

As I finished that off, I moved on to Kalimdor Elders, since I was finished with the Eastern Kingdom Elders, as well as the Cataclysm Elders; sans the Elder in Vashj'ir. Which is what I'm currently doing as I'm typing out this blog post. Silithus was a horrible experience, which seemed pretty normal. I'll be putting off the Darnassus, Dolanaar, and the two Elders in Mount Hyjal for the next time, so that I can put lots of time and patience into corpse running. I'll more than likely end up exploring all of Hyjal after getting those Elders as well. It seems to work out pretty well.

All in all.. A pretty good and productive day. I ran Razorfen Kraul and Scarlet Monastery: Armory today as well, not that anything awesome really came out of those. Gained a total of (7) levels. Which I just gained my 7th level as of the end of this post.

Signing off for Journal Entry one, Kutira.

Name Changes and Other Things

Paying attention to my character navigation bar on the side, you'll notice that Buttske and Zelgadiss are both gone and replaced with two new-comers.

Buttske was originally a human male created by my close friend Caleb "Buttske" Breske. After moving away from my hometown, I kept the character alive. After playing him to level cap and gearing him, I realized that he needed a change or I wasn't going to be able to keep playing him. Especially since Caleb himself stop going by "Buttske," I decided to do a re-character customization. He went from being a gremlin-mouthed, ginger, human male.. To a pixie-cut, lean, aesthetically-pleasing, female night elf; named Laviana.

Zelgadiss was my originally toon way back when I first started playing World of Warcraft, on my own account. My first true toon was Xardion the Paladin under Corie's account. I played him to level 18 in the week I stayed with her over a break, went back home, bought WoW, and started my own. Xardion eventually got deleted from her account and recreated on my own, and then deleted and recreated again when Death Knights emerged, but we're getting off-topic here.
Corie's computer was pretty crappy back then, so I didn't realize just how Zelgadiss looked until I started playing on a more updated machine. Holy shit, was I ever a horrible character designed. I kept with him until I reached 85, geared him a bit, and then realized.. I seriously couldn't look at his ugly mug anymore. Also, I hate helmets. So I gender-swapped him, because a simple re-customization just wasn't going to fit that gargantuan and ugly night elf male model. He became Sollexi, with a form to match the class.

Maybe if Blizzard ever implements body sizes, I'll change Sollexi back. If night elves could have the lean forms of blood elves, my original idea behind Zelgadiss would work, but until then.. He's a girl.

As of now, only Railene and Arcia haven't gone through some sort of change.
     - Paragon was originally a dwarf named Ilgrid.
     - Xardion was originally a paladin, then he died and became a death knight.
     - We just went over Laviana/Buttske.
     - We just went over Zelgadiss/Sollexi.

These are also all of my current level 85 toons. I have an up-and-coming Horde Paladin, as well as a Draenei Shaman, but to get them to 85.. I'd actually have to play them.

I'm also currently participating in what was originally called the "Hardmode Reroll." Reroll a character on the underdog side of an unbalanced PvP server and level it to 85 and become a progressively competitive guild in the raiding and PvP scene. That character is currently level 34. I should create progress blog-posts about her. I probably will, to keep my goal in mind as I play her.

So.. a revamp of new content, new ideas, and more information. Looks like this blog now has something for me to actually work with and toward. Hurray goals!

Determination

2012 has occurred. Which brings around another cycle of holidays..

I never finished last year's holidays. I think my best solution to this particular situation is to cut-off all of the posts I was making for last year and start fresh and new.

I find this course of action to be the best. Also, I can still go back and do previews and my own personal feelings about the released patches, which doesn't need a time-frame.

Any opinions?

Children's Week

Children's Week, or the Week of the Wardens, seems to be loosely based off of Japan's Children's Day. You pick-up orphans from Stormwind/Orgrimmar, Shattrath City, and Dalaran and take them to places of their choosing to meet famous Lore heroes and buy them toys. At the completion of each separate string of quests, you'll receive your choice of multiple pets.

First we're going to go over the Stormwind and Orgrimmar quest chains. With the inclusion of Cataclysm, this quest-lines have changed from the past few years.

1. Cruisin' The Chasm: Your little human orphan wants you to take him down to Westfall, hop into one of the lovely rental choppers, and take a cruise over to the gigantic chasm with a huge tornado inside of it. Why we, as wardens, thought this would be a good idea, is beyond me. The kid has a good time, no one is dead, he's happy.
2. Malfurion Has Returned!: Take your orphan over to Darnassus and introduce him to the legendary druid himself, Malfurion Stormrage. Ol' Malfy will even throw an enchantment on the fella to give him wings for a bit.
3. The Biggest Diamond Ever!: If you've read the Warcraft novel 'The Shattering,' then you know what happens to poor Magni Bronzebeard. Your orphan wants to see him. Head on over to Ironforge and go to the throne room. That door that's always been closed is now open and you can head down into Old Ironforge to see Magni.
4. You Scream, I Scream...: Head over to the Mage Quarter of Stormwind. Near the Blue Recluse inn, there is a small ice cream stand. Purchase a 'Cone of Cold' ice cream cone and hand it over to your little orphan.
5. Let's Go Fly A Kite: There is a gnome pushing a small cart around the outside of the Trade District. Stop him and purchase a 2-Part Kite set. Fly the kites with your orphan for a bit.
6. A Warden Of The Alliance: Purchase a Foam Sword Rack from the traveling gnome toy salesmen and return to the orphan matron. Turn in the rack, the orphans will snatch them up and start playing. The matron offers you your reward..
• Piglet's Collar: Mr. Wiggles the Pig.
• Rat Cage: Whiskers the Rat.
• Turtle Box: Speedy the Turtle.
• Snail Shell: Scooter the Snail.
• Curmudgeon's Payoff: 5 gold.

1. Ridin' The Rocketway: Your new orc orphan wants to go to the new Goblin Rocketway, so that's where you're headed. Head on over to Azshara and ascend the Southern Rocketway Terminus. Board the Redhound Two-Seater Prototype and take a trip down the rocketway in style.
2. The Banshee Queen: Time to head to the Tirisfal Glades and ascend into the Undercity to meet the matriarch of the Forsaken, Sylvanas Windrunner. Apparently the blood elf ambassador gets a little pissy that your orphan is speaking the Queen of the Dead herself.
3. The Fallen Chieftain: Just like the Alliance version to go see Magni, in 'The Shattering,' Cairne Bloodhoof challenges Garrosh Hellscream to a duel to the death. Magatha of the Grimtotem tribe poisons Garrosh's Gorehowl and a small cut cripples Cairne and Garrosh finishes him off.
4. You Scream, I Scream...: Head back to Orgrimmar and head down to the Goblin Slums section of town. Find the Cone of Cold shop and purchase a 'Cone of Cold' ice cream cone for your orphan. Let him get a brain freeze and then move on to the next quest.
5. Let's Go Fly A Kite: Much like the Alliance version, you have to find someone pushing a toy cart. This time, you're looking for a goblin on the outside of the Drag. Purchase the 2-Part Kite set and set them aloft with your orphan. After playing with them for some time, it's time to send them back to the orphanage.
6. A Warden Of The Horde: Pick up a Foam Sword Rack from the goblin toy vendor and head back to the orphan matron. Let the kids play around with their foam swords and then pick up your new companion, or your 5 gold.
• Piglet's Collar: Mr. Wiggles the Pig.
• Rat Cage: Whiskers the Rat.
• Turtle Box: Speedy the Turtle.
• Snail Shell: Scooter the Snail.
• Curmudgeon's Payoff: 5 gold.

And with that, it's time to move on to the Shattrath City orphan quests. Again, split into both Alliance and Horde questlines.

1. Auchindoun And The Ring Of Observance: Your little Draenei orphan wants to go to the Auchindoun, which is now the ruins of an old mausoleum for the Draenei people. Go see the Summoning Stone near the center and appease your orphan by trying to help them summon someone. 
2. Jheel Is At Aeris Landing!: Apparently our little orphan has a sibling who is working with the Ethereals over at the Aeris Landing in Nagrand. So that's where we're going. When arriving, they chat for a bit and your quest completion is after you talk to Jheel.
3. A Trip To The Dark Portal: Since your orphan is a Draenei, they've never seen the Dark Portal before. Time to head over that way and check it out. You have to land on the very top platform at the Dark Portal for your orphan to run up amazed at the sight.
4. The Seat Of The Naaru: Despite being a Draenei, they've never seen the Exodar. Time to take your little orphan down to the new Draenei capital city on Azeroth and have a talk with O'ros down at the bottom of the middle section of the Exodar. He'll tell you to go talk to Farseer Nobundo.
5. Time To Visit The Caverns: Quickest way to get here is to get a portal to Dalaran opened up by a friendly mage and take the free portal in the Violet Citadel. If you take the free dragon ride, you'll land opposite of the center of where you need to go. Go meet up with the big bronze dragon. After the little run-in, head back up the tunnel a bit and talk to the Keepers of Time quartermaster to get your toy dragon for your orphan. With toy in hand, it's time to return to the matron.
6. Back To The Orphanage: Head back to Shattrath the quickest way you know how. Either a mage friend or flying your ass through the Dark Portal. Upon getting back to the matron, you'll get your choice of four pets.
• Egbert's Egg: Egbert the Baby Hawkstrider.
• Elekk's Training Collar: Peanut the Baby Elekk.
• Sleepy Willy: Willy the Baby Beholder.
• Legs: Legs the Mini Marshwalker.

1. Hch'uu Of The Mushroom People: After picking up your new little Blood Elf companion, it's time to head over to Zangarmarsh and meet up with your orphan's long, lost friend of the Sporeggar people; Hch'uu. Who apparently ran away from a fungal giant and got lost, which is why she was in the Shattrath orphanage.
2. Visit The Throne Of The Elements: After the reminiscing is over with, it's time to make your way over to Nagrand and drop in on the Elementals of the Throne. Let the orphan have a wide-eyed gander at all of the large-sized Elementals before talking to one of the Earthen Ring.
3. A Trip To The Dark Portal: Finishing up on the Throne of the Elements makes your orphan want to take a peak at another oversized site; the Dark Portal that leads to Azeroth. Land up on the platform and let your orphan get an eyeful of the object that spans two planets and connects them together.
4. Now, When I Grow Up...: Unlike the Draenei orphan that is destined to become a powerful shaman of her people, your Blood Elf has a less significant goal in life.. to become part of the Elite Tauren Chieftains rock band. Head over to the Blood Elf capital of Silvermoon City to wave at the band members.
5. Time To Visit The Caverns: Find a quick way to get to Dalaran, so you can steal the free portal down to the Caverns of Time. Either fly your way down when you get there and pick up the toy dragon from the quartermaster on the way down, or take the free flight from the dragon at the top. Either way, go see the big bronze dragon and get your toy dragon. With all that finished, it's time to head back to Shattrath City.
6. Back To The Orphanage: Head back to Shattrath the quickest way you know how. Either a mage friend or flying your ass through the Dark Portal. Upon getting back to the matron, you'll get your choice of four pets.
• Egbert's Egg: Egbert the Baby Hawkstrider.
• Elekk's Training Collar: Peanut the Baby Elekk.
• Sleepy Willy: Willy the Baby Beholder.
• Legs: Legs the Mini Marshwalker.

Not that it matters the order in which you complete the questlines involved with either faction's orphan quests.. You can now head to Dalaran and pick up one of two quests for one more Children's Week pet. Depending on which questline you complete, depends on the pet that you receive.

1. Little Orphan Roo Of The Oracles: Talk to the matron standing near the floating statue by the southern bank and select this option to start the quest to get the Gorloc pet.
2. The Biggest Tree Ever!: Grab the little Oracles orphan and make your way over to the Grizzly Hills. You're going to be going to Grizzlemaw, the home of the furbolgs. You have to go down to the very bottom of the tree, where there is small tree growing.
3. The Bronze Dragonshrine: After escaping the furbolgs, it's time to head over to the Bronze Dragonshrine in Dragonblight. Much like when, or if, you did the quests for Chromie at the Wyrmrest Temple, your little orphan here is going to see the future version of himself.
4. Playmates!: Once he's done talking to himself, head on over to the Borean Tundra and swing down to the Winterfin Retreat. Your orphan will meet up with a baby murloc and start dancing. Though how Bladestorming can be considered dancing, I'm not entirely sure..
5. Meeting A Great One: Once your orphan is done making friends, it's time to go experience some Oracles culture. Go up into the Sholazar Basin and head through the Waygate by the Mosslight Pillar. Passing through this Waygate teleports you to the Un'goro Crater. Make your way up the little pathway and stop at the angry-looking construct.
6. The Dragon Queen: Head back through the Waygate to get back to the Basin and make your way back down to Dragonblight. It's time to stop in at the Wyrmrest Temple. Your little orphan wants to meet the Life-Binder herself.
7. A Trip To The Wonderworks: Time to head back to Dalaran, but before you go talk to the matron, your little buddy here wants to get some playtime in with you. Head over to the Wonderworks toy shop and buy the Small Paper Zeppelin. It's only available for purchase when you're actually on this quest. After you toss it back and forth, it's time to take him back to the matron.
8. Back To The Orphanage: Head back over to the floating statue and return the Oracle back to the matron. You won't receive the pet initially, but it comes in the mail. Logging out and back in should do it, or taking a portal somewhere else. Any loading screen makes it appear, I believe.
• Curious Oracle Hatchling: Roo the Curious Oracle Hatchling.

1. Little Orphan Kekek Of The Wolvar: Talk to the matron standing near the floating statue by the southern bank and select this option to start the quest to get the Wolvar pet.
2. Home Of The Bear-Men: Once you're got your feisty little devil with you, it's time to head over to the Grizzly Hills. You're going to be going to the home of the furbolgs, Grizzlemaw. You're going to have to go to the very bottom of the broken tree to where a small tree is growing.
3. The Bronze Dragonshrine: Once that's over, it's time to head over to Dragonblight. You're going to be making a stop at the Bronze Dragonshrine for your little orphan to meet his future-self and have a little heart-to-heart.
4. Playmates!: Since you're in Dragonblight still, you might as well wonder over to the Snowfall Glade and let your orphan pup play around with some other Wolvar pups. They throw snowballs at each other for a while.
5. The Dragon Queen: Then it's time to head over to the Wyrmrest Temple, where your orphan wants to meet the mighty Alexstrasza. Krasus even talks to him for a bit.
6. The Mighty Hemet Nesingwary: Once you're done meeting the Queen of the Red Dragonflight, it's time to head over to the Sholazar Basin and meet your orphans hunter idol. Head over to the Nesingwary Base Camp on the western side of the Basin, so your orphan can have a chat with Hemet Nesingwary.
7. A Visit To The Wonderworks: Once he's gotten all of his meet-and-greets out of the way, it's time to head back to Dalaran. Before heading back to the matron, you need to make a quick stop in at the Wonderworks toy shop. Your Wolvar orphan wants to have a little playtime with you, by tossing back and forth some paper zeppelins. Make sure to pick-up the Small Paper Zeppelin that's only for purchase when you have this quest.
8. Back To The Orphanage: After you're done playing, it's time to go back to the matron. Head over to the floating statue by the southern bank and return your Wolvar orphan. You won't receive your pet initially, but it comes in the mail. Logging out and back in should do it, or taking a portal to somewhere else. Any loading screen makes it appear, I believe.
• Curious Wolvar Hatchling: Kekek the Curious Wolvar Hatchling.

And now that we've gone over ALL of the questlines, for both Alliance and Horde, it's time to look at getting those achievements. Hopefully you still have some time left after traversing multiple continents and separate worlds to get some of these in.

• Home Alone: Is your orphan currently staring at your with wondrous eyes of wonder? Use your hearthstone. Congratulations, you just left your orphan wherever you just were. But you got an achievement! Now, blow your whistle again and get back to making them happy. Asshole.
• Bad Example: Begin nomming on delicious sweets right in front of your poor little orphan. Head to Dalaran and pick up a Red Velvet Cupcake, a Lovely Cake Slice, a Dalaran Doughnut, and a Dalaran Brownie. After that, head down to Stormwind and pick up a cone of Tigole and Foror's Strawberry Ice Cream. Then, either make or procure a Delicious Chocolate Cake and a Tasty Cupcake. Devour all of this in front of your hungry orphan's face and you.. are a horrible person.
• Daily Chores: Have your orphan with you as you complete five daily quests. Any five, doesn't matter what. It's more exciting if you make it something dangerous. Like.. Fishing. Or cooking.
• Aw, Isn't It Cute?: Complete any string of orphan quests from the Stormwind/Orgrimmar, Shattrath, or Dalaran orphans and receive a pet. You get this achievement just for getting a pet. It's win/win!
• School Of Hard Knocks: One of those "awesome" PvP achievements that Blizzard likes to integrate into certain holidays to make you experience both the PvE and PvP aspects of the game. Have your orphan out as you return a fallen flag in Warsong Gulch, assault a base in Arathi Basin, assault a tower in the Alterac Valley, and capture a flag in Eye of the Storm. This achievement will probably take the longest for most people depending on level and the player.
• Hail To The King, Baby: Be of level and head into Utgarde Pinnacle in Howling Fjord of Northrend. Make your way to the end of the instance and knock King Ymiron's face in. Make sure your orphan is watching! As he goes down, your orphan will cheer at death. Since this achievement has a level requirement, it might be the last of the meta you're working toward for this holiday.
• Veteran Nanny: A three-year long achievement. You have to get three of the, now, four Shattrath pets; Peanut, Willy, and Egbert. Legs is a new addition to the roster, so he doesn't count toward this achievement. He might in the future, but as of right now, it's still only the original Burning Crusade three.

And now time for my own accomplishments..

Warrior: Matron of '09. Received Veteran Nanny in '11.

Paladin: Matron of '10. Received her first pet back in '08. Finished off Veteran Nanny in '11.

Druid: Matron of '10. Two more years to go until Veteran Nanny.

Death Knight: Patron of '10. Two more years to go until Veteran Nanny.

Mage: Not a Patron. Being a weak-bodied mage, taking down King Ymiron without a group will be tough. The King dies next year. Veteran Nanny in three years, because I apparently didn't do the Shattrath questline at all this year.

Rogue: Not a Patron. Rogue wasn't a bad enough example, didn't go to school, and wasn't a high enough level for the King. At least he'll be a Veteran Nanny in two years.

Noblegarden

Blizzard's version of Easter for the World of Warcraft. This is a week long event that, like most of the religious related events, has absolutely nothing to do with anything religion based. Your main goal behind the Noblegarden holiday?

Go egg-hunting. A lot.

The only quests involved with this holiday are ones that ask you to gather eggs. One of them is even a daily! So, seriously.. Get to gathering eggs. All of the achievements obtainable for this holiday require you to get something out of the eggs. Whether it be actual pieces of holiday clothing, or the chocolate that is then used to purchase items from the holiday vendor to participate in certain events.

Egg-Hunting. Serious business. Okay, screw this, time for the achievements.

• I Found One!: Remember how I told you to go egg-hunting already? You get this for finding an egg. Aren't you amazing?!

• Chocolate Lover/Chocoholic: For each egg that you gather up, you get a piece of Noblegarden Chocolate. You can either save these up and use them as currency, or devour 100 of them to get the two achievements. The first one is for eating 25. Keep eating all the way up to 100 and you get Chocoholic.

• Sunday's Finest: While you're out snatching up those brightly colored eggs for people to slow to get them before you can.. You're going to be on the look out for special clothing. To get this particular achievement, you're looking for a White Tuxedo Shirt and a pair of Black Tuxedo Pants. You have to acquire both through the eggs, no purchasing or trading counts. Neither of these items are soulbound, so you can pass them over to your bank toon or to someone that just wants to look dandy.

• Dressed For The Occasion: Keep cracking open those eggs until you found yourself with an Elegant Dress. How they stuffed this, or even the pants or shirt, inside of an egg is beyond me. Like the pants and shirt, you can't cheat your way out of this and get them traded over or purchase them through the vendor.

• Hard Boiled: As your picking up eggs, you have a random chance to be turned into a bunny. This achievement will require this form, but the easiest way to complete the achievement is to get a friend who has a Bountiful Branch on them. Head on down to the Un'goro Crater and meander over to the Golakka Hot Springs. Become a bunny, lay an egg under the hot water, and you're done.

• Spring Fling: By either purchasing the Spring Rabbit pet from the vendor or getting it from one of those brightly colored eggs, you're going to have to do some traveling. You have to go to each of the four starter locations where eggs are located and have your Spring Rabbit and someone else's Spring Rabbit.. Make babies. When they say "like rabbits," they weren't kidding.

• Noble Garden: Use some of that leftover chocolate that I know you're tired of throwing out or eating and purchase your very own Brightly Colored Egg. Head into Stormwind or Orgrimmar and drop it down. Pick it right back up. Achievement get! Plus, you have a "free" chance at getting another item. You'll probably just get more chocolate, though.

• Shake Your Bunny Maker: Take your Spring Flowers item and equip it. You'll either get these from an egg or from the holiday vendor. Run around like a chicken with its head cut off until you find someone who is over level 18.. And is of the female variety. Use the flowers! Pow! Free bunny ears. Over level 18 and bunny ears.. Hrmmm...

• Desert Rose: Don your "beautiful" Spring Robes, either from an egg or from the vendor, and begin your long trek. You have to head down to The Badlands, Silithus, Desolace, Thousand Needles, and Tanaris. By 'using' your robes, you'll plant a rose. Do this in every desert and this achievement proves you have a green thumb.

• Blushing Bride: Find a friend wearing the Elegant Dress, whether it be male or female. Throw on your White Tuxedo Shirt and Black Tuxedo Pants and throw them a kiss or two.

And because it totally matters, here comes the item collection list for this holiday. I'm not going to bother mentioning that you can obtain these items out of the eggs. I'm only going to list their vendor prices.

• Tome of Polymorph: Rabbit: For mages only. This can only be purchased from the holiday vendor for a grand total of 100 Noblegarden Chocolate. You have to be level 60 to learn it AND to purchase it.
• Spring Rabbit's Foot: It's a bunny! You can purchase it with 100 Noblegarden Chocolate. You'll need to get this pet eventually if you plan on completing the holiday meta.
• Spring Circlet: Net yourself your own pair of sexy bunny ears with this 50 Noblegarden Chocolate purchase.
• Elegant Dress: If you plan on being the bride who blushes, drop 50 Noblegarden Chocolate off at your local holiday vendor and prepare to be blown away with kisses.
• White Tuxedo Shirt: Are you too sexy for your shirt? Well, pick up this dandy formal wear for 25 Noblegarden Chocolate.
• Black Tuxedo Pants: Combine with the White Tuxedo Shirt for best effect. For 25 Noblegarden Chocolate.
• Spring Robes: If you plan on going on a flower planting spree, you're going to need these robes. They put Harvest Moon to shame. To get your green thumb on, you only need 50 Noblegarden Chocolate.
• Spring Flowers: Want to become Hugh Hefner? Need some 'Bunnies? Grab a bouquet of Spring Flowers and get to hip-hopping. 50 Noblegarden Chocolate at your local 'Bunny Manor.
• Egg Basket: Completing the quest to gather 10 pieces of Noblegarden Chocolate nets you this item. It's an off-hand frill equip that gives you a 60% run speed increase for 10 seconds, on a 10 second cooldown. So you can spam it to gather eggs.

The fact that it took me this long to post a blog about this holiday is ridiculous and I feel like a huge failure for it.

Also, I don't think my lame jokes for the items could have gotten any worse.

Warrior: The Noble of '09. Had all achievements completed in two days.

Paladin: The Noble of '09. Had all achievements completed two days after my Warrior's meta was completed.

Druid: The Noble of '09. Had all achievements completed the day after my Paladin's meta was completed.

Death Knight: The Noble of '10. Had all achievements completed in two days. There's a pattern here..

Mage: The Noble of '09. Had all achievements completed between my Warrior's meta completion and when I started my Paladin's meta.

Rogue: Not a Noble. There needs to be some bunny love, bunny makin' shakin', a lovely dress, some bride kissing, some desert roses, and a hard boiled egg.

Love Is In The Air

Love Is In The Air is the week-long Holiday event based on Valentine's Day. This event used to be more interesting when it was first created, when you had to give gifts to guards and in return get presents back or a 'Heartbroken' debuff that prevented you from getting more presents for an hour.

Now you just go out and beat some guys up, turn in the quests, get heart-shaped gift tokens that you spend at a vendor to purchase the achievement-related items, the pet, and other such commodities. But I digress, since most holidays have changed into this particular model..

The questline has you taking samples from the guards around Stormwind/Orgrimmar, then stealing a crate from the Crown Chemical Co. in the guise of a goblin. (I wonder if Goblins even get the guise buff, they probably do..). The crates are packed with chemical-filled rockets. After that, you're sent to a lovely lady of the town to discover where Snivel Rustrocket, the crafter of the rockets, might be hiding. After encountering him in the Auction House, the bank, and the barbershop, you're sent to go stop him from escaping town via boat/zeppelin. Take Snivel's ledger back to the investigator and you get a question to head into Shadowfang Keep and knock out the Apothecary trio behind the Crown Chemical Co.'s shenanigans.

Additionally there are six dailies that you are able to do to gain more Love Tokens. Three are random, where you roam around town and use items on random people that don't have the buff you're trying to give them. Another is to go beat up some Crown Chemical Co. lackies and destroy their chemical wagon. Depending on your level depends on the location of where the mobs will be located at that you need to defeat. They change, roughly, every ten levels.

The last four are to take Lovely Charm Bracelets to the four faction leaders (excluding the Troll, Gnome, Worgen, and Goblin leaders). You have to acquire a Lovely Charm Bracelet Kit to begin collecting Lovely Charms off of mobs. Collecting ten charms creates a bracelet. Each faction leader also gives you a lovely card that gives you a different buff, but they don't stack with each other. On a side note; while the Lovely Charms are soulbound, the Lovely Charm Bracelets are not. So you can trade them off to alts or your main for quicker Token acquisition.

Before I go over the achievements and how to get them, I'm going to give a quick overview of the boss fight for this holiday. It wasn't very difficult at all when it was first introduced last year, this year wasn't much more difficult, just you had to teach the new people that didn't know what to do. It was also harder to use the same tactics from last year, and much more difficult to DPS tank. Like we were doing last year, hehe.

Apothecary Hummel is the "main" target of the fight, but he comes with two others; Apothecary Baxter and Apothecary Frye. There are items off to the side to negate certain effects used by the bosses during the fight. Hummel uses an Alluring Perfume, using the Perfume Neutralizer negates all but his melee attacks. Baxter uses  Irresistible Cologne and the Cologne Neutralizer takes care of him. Frye is simply and annoyance and uses both, but he can be completely ignored for the most part of the fight. Upon initiating the fight, you can only attack Hummel. After, I believe, 15 seconds, Baxter activates and you can attack him as well. About the same time after that, Frye activates as well. The easiest way to do this is for the tank to hold both Hummel and Baxter and wear the Neutralizer for whichever boss gets downed first and then switch to the other. Another possibly strategy is to just have a DPS hold Baxter until Hummel is downed. Frye has no aggro table, which is why I said to just ignore him.

Possible loots to acquire! These bosses drop level appropriate necklaces as their mandatory gear drop. Aside from that, they drop flavor loot, which is the norm for all holiday bosses.

• Forever-Lovely Rose: A simply headpiece that makes your character have a rose in their mouth. No required level, but since you have to be 85 to even activate the fight.. You get the idea.
• Vile Fumigator's Mask: A headpiece that makes your character wear a gas mask. Also has the added effect of stunning your target for 30 secs. Completely worthless, honestly, at max level. Amusing for recreational purposes.
• The Heartbreaker: I've never actually seen this item drop, but it apparently just makes your character burst into tears. With a one minute cooldown, it's almost not worth it.. But I'd keep it if I'd've ever won it.
• Toxic Wasteling: No holiday is complete without a pet. This one is just like the Disgusting Oozeling, but as this one travels past critters.. It eats it. And gets bigger. Also, no debuff!
• Big Love Rocket: This is the money maker. It's a giant pink rocket with a zebra-striped seat cover. Plus.. the in-game icon for it is pink and phallic-shaped. Innuendos everywhere!

On to the achievements, which is why everyone reads this! Woot.

• Be Mine!: Purchase the Bags of Heart Candies from the vendor using Love Tokens and eat one of each of the eight Heart Candies. Each bag costs two Love Tokens and the Heart Candies aren't soulbound, so you can AH or trade them off to friends to assist others in getting their achievements.

• Charming: Grab your Lovely Charm Bracelet Kit and get to destroying lots of mobs. You're going to need 120 Lovely Charms for this achievement, because you need to create twelve Lovely Bracelets. Lovely Charms are soulbound, so there is no avoiding this achievement. Though if you don't need those bracelets once you get the achievement, you can pass them on to someone else or try to sell them.

• Dangerous Love: Being the Crown Chemical Co. questline in either capital city and run it through to its completion of crushing the crown and turning the daily back into the investigator in Stormwind City or Orgrimmar. You'll receive the achievement at that time.

• Fistful Of Love: Since Cataclysm's release, this achievement got a little harder. Since we don't have Dalaran or Shattrah to hang around in anymore, finding the correct Horde race/class combinations are going to require people to actually head into battlegrounds. Or have a friend who has free open character creation slots who is willing to waste their time creating toons for you to throw rose petals on them. You get Handfuls of Rose Petals from the holiday vendors; two Love Tokens for five Handfuls. Since it's uneven, you'll have to over-purchase just to complete the achievement, but keep an extra on hand for another achievement. Handful of Rose Petals are also not soulbound, so you can give away your extras or sell them.

• Flirt With Disaster: Head over to Ironforge and stop in at an inn. Pile up on the heavy drinks and make your way to the Great Forge section of town. Skull the drinks down, grab one of your leftover Handful of Rose Petals and start searching. Find Sraaz strolling around the area, throw your rose petals on him, and then throw the beautiful little gnome a huge kiss. He sells pie, so I don't see how he could be such a huge disaster.

• I Pitied The Fool: This one is going to take some time. You have to be at least level 70 to complete this achievement, since you need to be able to enter a level 70 raid instance. You're also going to need the time necessary to collect and acquire 50 Love Tokens so you can buy up five Love Fools. Or have a friend who has extra, since they're not soulbound. You have ten days of real time to throw these puppies down in Naxxramas, the Culling of Stratholme, the blacksmith in Arathi Basin, anywhere in Wintergrasp, or the Gurubashi Arena in Stranglethorn and give them the ol' pity stare. Simple in it's execution to say the least.

• Lonely?: Throw down ten more Love Tokens to pick yourself up a Romantic Picnic Basket and then ten more Tokens for a Box of Chocolates and hope you get the chocolate treat you desire. You're going to need to head over to Dalaran, plop down your picnic basket, and wait for someone who is as lonely as you to plop down beside you.. So you can share a Buttermilk Delight with them. Warcraft isn't all rainbows and sunshine anymore. As usual, the chocolates from the Box of Chocolates aren't soulbound, but the box itself is.. As is the picnic basket.

• Lovely Luck Is On Your Side: Head over to our lovely holiday vendors and use twenty of your Love Tokens to pick up a Lovely Dress Box. Open it up and if inside you find yourself a coveted Lovely Black Dress, you earn this achievement to go alongside your newest fashion statement. The Lovely Dress Box has an even 25% chance to drop one of four dress; Black, Purple, Blue, or Red. There is also a Dinner Suit Box with three dinner suits in it, but who cares about those. It's not a pretty black dress! None of these dresses, or even the suits, are soulbound. Share them with your lowbies or friends who need something for a date.

• My Love Is Like A Red, Red Rose: Bouquet of Red Roses and Bouquet of Ebon Roses are your target items here. I can't give much information on this particular item because with each level cap change, the bosses that drop this item changes. So while it was Admiral Ripsnarl of the Deadmines, Lord Godfrey of Shadowfang Keep, Corla, Herald of the Twilight of Blackrock Caverns, Drahga Shadowburner of Grim Batol, and High Priestess Azil of Stonecore this year.. When another expansion comes out, it'll all just change again. You only need one or the other to gain this achievement, not both.

• Nation Of Adoration: You know how you made those twelve Lovely Charm Bracelets awhile back for the Charming achievement? Hope you kept four of them to turn into the four faction leaders of whichever faction you are to gain this achievement. If not.. Get back to farming, you're going to need forty more Lovely Charms.

• Perma-Peddle: Use forty of your Love Tokens to purchase a Truesilver Shafted Arrow to acquire this permanent companion version of the pet gained from the Silver Shafted Arrow you can purchase from the holiday vendor for a five for five deal.

• The Rocket's Pink Glare: Love Rockets are currently on sale at your local holiday vendor for a five-for-five deal. You're going to need to pick up two sets, because you need ten for this achievement. Your goal is launch all ten of your rockets in twenty seconds or less. It's pretty simple, just don't dilly-dally if you're bad at placing your targeting area.

• Shafted: Pick up some Silver Shafted Arrows from your local holiday vendor, turn around, and being your role as Cupid. The arrows are another five-for-five deal, so you're going to need to pick up double the initial purchase to finish off this achievement. And again, the arrows are not soulbound.

• Sweet Tooth: Remember when I told you to buy Box of Chocolates for your romantic picnic alone in Dalaran? Well, this one is to eat one of each of the four chocolates that can come out of that box. The chocolates aren't soulbound, as usual.

• Tough Love: Defeat the Apothecary Trio inside of Shadowfang Keep. You're going to need to be level capped to even make an attempt on these guys. At least this isn't a part of the meta, so it's not required to get your "Love Fool" title.

• Big Love Rocket: The Feat of Strength attached to this holiday through acquiring the Big Love Rocket mount from the Apothecary Trio.

And now my own personal achievement list..

Warrior: Love Fool of '09. Achieved all achievements within the first two days of the holiday. Took down the Apothecary Trio in '10 when they were first released. No dice on the Big Love Rocket.

Paladin: Love Fool of '10. I apparently wasn't at a high enough level in '09 to get at the bosses that dropped the bouquets, nor get inside of Naxxramas to drop a Love Fool whom to pity.

Druid: Love Fool of '11. Completed most of the achievements back in '09, but had to knock out the chocolate eating and silver shafting people in '10. Finally completed the rest of the meta in '11 by picking up a beautiful bouquet and pitying some fools. Also took down the dastardly trio in '11.

Death Knight: Love Fool of '11. Completed most of the achievements within the first three days. Getting up enough Love Tokens for my Handful of Rose Petals, Truesilver Shafted Arrow, Lovely Dress Box, and Romantic Picnic Basket are what took me the longest. I wasn't high enough to get inside of Naxxramas in '10, so I pitied my final fool in '11.

Mage: Love Fool of '11. Knocked all achievements, but six in '09. Shafted some people in '10. Moved on in '11 to pity and bouquets. While picking up a flying goblin pet, the apothecary did not get to feel the wrath of a mage.

Rogue: Nowhere near being a Love Fool. This rogue is not charming, doesn't know how to pity or flirt, is quite lonely, has useless fists, has no luck, and has weak love like a wilting dandelion. If you can't pick up what achievement he's lacking, you're not very good at this.

And that concludes my rundown of Love Is In The Air! We'll see you next year for this holiday, hopefully gallivanting around Stormwind City atop a Big Love Rocket of some kind.